I suppose it was a revelation to learn that just because someone loves you, you don't have to love them back. And you can't tell that person their loving you is wrong.
- Belle de Jour
'I'm sorry; I know I've done so many things wrong, I'm so so sorry,' he said. His eyes had gone red, and his shoulders turned in. I was struck with a pang of tenderness. I said nothing, though. He kept on apologizing, crying. I let him. I thought of all the time when we were dating when he hadn’t apologized, and it tore me up, or the few times he did and I’d hurry to soothe him and reassure him it wasn’t his fault.
No interrupting this time. I just let him get it off his chest.
It was hard to watch. I knew I could lift him, end what he was feeling. I knew I could make the next ten minutes a lot easier for us both – maybe even the next ten days, if we were lucky, until we argued again – by saying I’d have him back. But I knew there would be always an argument waiting round the corner. And whatever he said, people don’t just change. Not that they can’t change, but no one does overnight, and I had enough,
And that’s what I told him.
- Belle de Jour
Having read that second bit, I told peach that night that she wouldn’t want me back. ‘And how would you know?’ she asked. ‘I just finished reading The Intimate Adventures of a London Call Girl.’ I replied.
I first stumbled upon Belle De Jour at Borders, among the staffs’ recommendation section. Though, I have to admit l like the other book better. When I first started reading it, I didn’t quite know what exactly a call girl is, if I did, maybe the sexy front cover would not interest me that much. I thought call girls are those ladies a man call over the phone and have dirty talk with, far from the truth, call girls do much more.
I kept reading it later because it was such an unusual and controversial topic to begin with, and propelled by the ultimate curiosity on the subject of who are her clients, what is in her mind and how she deals with the reality that she is a call girl and a tutor on her way of completing her doctoral studies. Will she ever quits when she gets over her financial crisis? Money came too easy; significant chunk of cash though traded with flesh (what if you enjoy what you doing?), temptation will always be there.
It is not quite a genre appealed to many; most couldn’t get past their own moral sense or principles to actually lift up the book and read it, no that they are not interested, they are not supposed to engage or involve with that matter in any way. The book did hook me up, my soul are weak.
I would not claim that her books are a must-read but I am fine with occasionally settling for a different taste. Her bald and no nonsense straight to the point writings is the selling point. Sneak peep at her personal thoughts, don’t we all like discovering others’ secrets and a glimpse at the reality of a call girl. I would call her writings a fine gem in her own league.
What have I learned? Her clients are normally not adept and capable at socializing, some have fantasizes and spouse isn’t the best one to share with. Others just lacking companionship. Besides, they are paying to get their needs satisfied, their wishes will be done and it is perfectly acceptable to be self-centered, as long as they keep forking out the cash. It is not two person businesses but the client and only his, or could be her.
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